WONDERING

Sometimes I really wanna know....
Am I think too much?
Or it is true?
I really wonder
I won't feel anything negative when with you
But its opposite when you are not around
the way you treat me
the words you say to me
everything...
You know what,
Sometimes I really really really wish that
The time can go back to the first few months
How you really treat me
It just let me feel so safe so warm so nice
Maybe for now,
You will think thats so immature and all
Time is moving
You and me is changing
I really hope the changes of these everything is positive
I keep preventing from arguement
I keep quiet and keep to myself
Sometimes the way you say things
The way you treat me
Really makes me feel like I am nothing to you
Or maybe just a normal friend to you
Is this the mature way that you want?
I am a girl
No! I think I should say I am a woman
I need someone to really care me and I can feel very safe
(still remember when the moment we are still in friend level?Or just coupled?)
Honestly,
Every messages that you sent me since last year
All is still in my phone
I love to re-read all most of the time
Every single word that you said to me

Maybe I'm just not that open-minded enough
I'm sensitive about every single thing of yours
Worth or not?
I don't know
All I know is....
All just for you.

"HONEST"
The word that I very focus in every relationship of mine
Even just a tiny useless thing that hidden away from me
It's still consider a lie to me
I saw damn a lot of relationships around me
Full with LIES!
Why human being can be so cruel even with their love ones?
Two person be together can't just be so pure and simple?
Say out every thought or share everything with your partner
Is it that difficult?
What's the meaning
if a lovely couple continue living in a relationship that full with lies?
Have you ever think of the opposite ones?
What's their feeling when they found out the truth?
What's the feeling when knowing self is being fool by the beloved one?
It's just so hurt!
For me,
I really prefer share out everything
Eventhough it might be hurt
But at least I know
One of my friend said that :
"sometimes lie is not a bad thing though"
I totally disagree about it!
Just please think about the person's feeling when you trying to lie
If you still choose to lie that person,
Then please do stay away from him/her
You are just so cruel okay!
Fuck off!
People who really love you do not deserve these kind of treats
They deserve a better one!
People did so much sacrifices just to give all the best one for their beloved one
They might be wrong in some ways
But all is just for you
I bet you will totally REGRET when they decided to leave you
There might won't have anyone
who is willing to do so much for you
who is falling that deep on you
who is loving you that deep
who is care so much for you
A person will get tired when they is being hurt
again and again and again
One day, they might just walk away and wish you the best in future
People always won't appreciate until they regret
So,
Wake up and deeply appreciate the one who is beside you
No one willing to do that much as that person does


learning bit by bit

adios
jennytienchin